Hello everyone. My name is M.J. and I'm addicted to gadgets.
In order to properly tell this tale, I have to back up a decade or two and really date myself. I didn't get my first email address until my sophomore year of college because before then, most people didn't have email addresses. My much more techo forward friend, Ben, convinced me to get one through the school. I resisted at first, figuring I'd never use it because I hadn't used one so far in life so why would I ever need an email address? He changed my mind when he said, "everyone else is doing it..." because I never could (and still can't) resist a good bout pf peer pressure (please note: I'm kidding). I don't remember why I relented but I did and I got my very first email address.
And then quickly became an email addict.
Next Ben showed me how to use the internet because, until then, I'd never freaking used the internet. I told him I didn't really need it and I'd probably never use it but he showed me anyway. It took me an embarassingly long time to navigate cyberspace but eventually I worked it out.
And then quickly became an internet junkie.
If you're very smart, or just marginally awake, you'll notice a pattern emerging. Me resisting the latest technology saying, "No, I don't need that. I won't use it" and then me becoming addicted to that very object/service. My sophomore year in college is when it started and it plagues me even to this day.
It's why I have a desktop, a laptop and a 10" netbook. It's why I have a Kindle. It's why I have a perfectly fine 8GB iPod and yet am considering buying another one because when I bought it, I was sure 8GB would be plenty of space only now it isn't and I find myself constantly having to make hard decisions about which songs to keep and which to cut. No one should have to make those kind of decisions. No one.
And it's why, six days ago, when I dropped my so-called smart phone, it was a small disaster in my rather pathetic little corner of the world.
Funny thing with my so-called smart phone. I didn't want it at first. I was perfectly happy with my little phone that could make calls and receive calls, take a few low megapixel pictures and send text messages. It was chic, it was adorable and it was just like the one Veronica Mars used (yes, I make all my decisions based on television shows. But only the awesome ones...). Then The Man decided to upgrade to a new phone. A smart phone. And he asked if I wanted one. I didn't. Here's how that conversation went:
Him: Want a smart phone?
Me: No, I don't need one.
Him: But you can go on the internet with it.
Me: I can go on the internet with my desktop. Or my laptop. I don't need a phone to go on the internet. I need a phone to make phone calls.
Him: You're gonna want one. Trust me.
Me: No, I really don't think I'd use it...
We'll stop there because I think, if you were paying attention earlier, you'll know what happened next.
I got a smart phone. And promptly became addicted to it to the point that when I dropped it on Sunday night and broke it to the point where all it would do was make or receive calls, it was the worst thing since low calorie sliced bread. Ever see anyone go through sudden withdrawal? That was me this week. It was pathetic. But not quite as pathetic as this exchange I had with The Man's co-worker:
Him: But how can you Tweet if your phone's broken?
Me: I still have three computers.
Him: Oh. Right.
But all's right in the world now because the new phone arrived yesterday afternoon. Its speed and intelligence far outmatches the old phone's (and mine too) but I managed to (eventually) work out how to use it. Kind of. I mean, I figured out how to get all the really important things on the phone: Facebook, Twitter, Angry Birds, my Dr. Horrible ringtone and my Hunger Games notification whistle.
What else do I need?
According to The Man, I need a tablet (His boss is convinced I need a tablet too. Why they spend so much time in the office discussing my gadget needs, I do not know, but there it is). The Man is even willing to let me get an iPad if that's the one I want. (This is a Big Deal because The Man is not an Apple person by any stretch of the imagination.) But I don't want an iPad. I don't want a tablet of any kind. I have gadgets o'plenty that will allow me to access my email and the internet. Blog. Read books. Save eggs from evil cartoon pigs or check Red Sox scores or listen to music or anything else I could ever want.
Why would I want something that would let me do all of that in one conveniently sized device? Where's the fun in that?
So what do you think? Are you a slave to technology? Do you think I should get a tablet? And, most importantly, did you start singing the "Inspector Gadget" theme song as soon as you saw the title of the post? Let me know...
Oh, and everyone enjoy your holiday weekend. See y'all next week.